oh, deer..

Sohail: i hate fucking deer
Sam: they don’t fancy it much either
Sohail: yeah well, tell them the rash’ll clear up in a few days!

Lenovo software rant

Sam: tell her if it doesn’t work you’ll send her an old IBM mouse with the stupid blue glowing joystick thing instead of a wheel. that should make her try harder
Sam: my workstation has one of those
Paul: lmao
Sam: it’s so annoying. the software to make the joystick thing work pops up a window every time you drag a scroll bar saying “Did you know you can scroll windows using your mouse?”.. gotta check the box NEVER TELL ME THAT THING AGAIN EVER! hehe
Sam: there’s no button for “I know that, but the joystick is so hard to use it’s easier to drag the scroll bar”
Sam: IBM needs to cut it out with the popups.. the thinkpads do it too the second time you login to them. “Did you know you can eject your thinkpad from a dock by pressing Fn+F9?”
Sam: and again, no button for “But my laptop is in a dock, so the lid is closed. How do you expect me to press Fn+F9?”

Animal Parts

Sam: yo the “help me decide” thing for deodorant lists “for vegetarians” as an option.. I’m intrigued
Sam: all it does is turn off “deodorant only” and leaves the antiperspirant / deodorant ones
Sam: now I think I want deodorant only, just to mess with vegetarians
Sohail: there is something wrong with you
Sam: dude who doesn’t want animal parts all up in their underarms?
Sohail: i love animal parts up under my arms
Sam: I’m curious as to what animal parts the deodorant has
Sam: I hope it’s made from something adorable, like bunnies
Sohail: more like its got gelatin or something
Sam: that’s much less amusing to imagine

Sam: I bought a few 80s songs from the iTunes store earlier this week, and now it’s recommending more 80s songs.. I’m gonna end up spending so much money lol
Sohail: download the sunglasses song
Sohail: sunglasses at night
Sam: be more specific
Sam: ok
Sohail: i think you will like it
Sam: Corey Hart or Inner Circle?
Sam: Corey Hart is the most popular, so I’m assuming that’s the one
Sam: yes! 80s synth pop!
Sam: this is so purchased

Burnt Toast

Sohail: have you ever overburned with toast?
Sam: huh?
Sam: oh, I get it
Sam: Roxio Toast
Sam: not bread

You wish!

11:31:09 AM Sam: he always has an away message, but he’s not always away
11:31:27 AM Sohail: same thing in my book lol
11:31:39 AM Sam: u wish
11:33:47 AM Sohail: nope, I know
11:33:54 AM Sam: u wish u knew
11:35:00 AM Sohail: i know I know!
11:35:10 AM Sam: u wish u knew u knew
11:35:34 AM Sohail: i wish u knew i know i know!
11:35:52 AM Sam: u wish i wish u knew u know u know
11:39:07 AM Sohail: i know u wish i wish u knew i know i know
11:39:26 AM Sam: u wish u know i wish u wish i knew u know u know
11:40:09 AM Sohail: u wish i wish i know u know u wish i wish u knew i know i know
11:40:16 AM Sam: u wish
11:40:20 AM Sohail: HAHA
11:40:36 AM Sam: 😛

Go directly to jail

Sam: vid-yuh games
Gil: i played some today, yes
Sam: lies
Gil: no i did, i beat a game
Sam: was the killer you?
Gil: well, you have to kill to beat the game, yes
Sam: gil. you’re playing monopoly totally wrong.
Gil: heh, but i really wanted park place

Randomness

Jay: I received a call that i thought was you
Jay: but was actually ru paul
Sam: it’s a common mistake

Reoob!

Jay: brb reoob
Jay: reboot
Jay: LOL